Sunday, June 27, 2010

the robot commercial sketch

There is a robot in the middle of the stage. Two children are on either side of it, trying to get it to help them.

Kid#1: I need him to clean up my room!

Kid #2: Well, I need him to help me with my geometry!

Robot’s arms go up. Kids Freeze.

Robot: Does this ever happen to you? Do you ever feel as if your humans are pulling you in too many directions? Do you wish there was an easier way for you to get everything done? Well look no further. From the great minds that invented Rohypnol comes a domestic robot’s dream. THE SLEEP LASER. For three easy installments of $29.95, you can get THE SLEEP LASER implanted in your arm. THE SLEEP LASER is compatible with all 3XG actuators. Also available with an adaptor for earlier models.

Robot waves his arms down and unfreezes the children.


Robot points his arm at both of the children (LASER SOUND) and they both fall asleep.

Robot: Think of all the work you can get done!

Masked burglar with gun runs in from stage right.

Masked burglar: Give me all your money!

Robot points his arm at Burglar and puts him to sleep.

Robot: Perfect for home invasions!

The wife walks in with the husband from stage left.

Wife (to husband): Not tonight, honey, I have a headache.

Husband (to robot): A little help here?

Robot points his arm at the wife (LASER SOUND) and she passes out in her husband’s arms.

Robot: Now you too can get your humans to shut the hell up and give you some peace and quiet.

Man (only one still awake onstage): Hey, Wait a minute!

Robot points laser at man and he falls asleep too.

Robot: Call now!


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